Tapping Into The Grid
[Transcription of a reading done on 7 August 2012 about drawing our strength from our core, not our effort]
We are, we are thankful to take a moment with you here to settle in together, to sit by your side, to hear you, to hold you, to bring you home.
Coming home
The notion of home is far stronger than a household or a piece of land, or even a sense of tribal or cultural identity. When human beings fight or grieve over those things they are fighting or grieving over something very significant to the human soul, but far deeper than location or land or culture or family. The notion of home can be associated with deep rest, with deep peace, and also with the sense of being taken care of. And that is very much what we wish to bring you here.
Although, we can only bring something close to you for you to choose; we cannot ever enforce or make anyone choose anything, not at all. But today what we wish to offer to you in response to what we see in your field is an experience of home because, you know, there is a space, there is a space, where you can come and rest, where you do not need to be responsible, in charge, and taking care of so many aspects and people. There is a space in which you can be held and put down the concerns and issues of the day.
That space in its real and fullest meaning is deep inside you. Your poets and mystics and artists over and over again have pointed towards this place. But no one, no one, can tell you how to get there, or what exactly it feels like, because only you find your way back home in your specific way. But it is very much something we would encourage you to allow for yourself so that you are activating a very strong sense of peace and also so that you are tapping in to your real source of strength.
Where do you get your strength?
Your strength – to get through what you need to get through in the day, to take care of dependants, to plan ahead, to keep everything ticking over – that strength you can draw from wherever you like. Some people draw strength from their bodies primarily, too much, and then experience the physical repercussions of that somewhere down the line. Some people use their emotional strength to push on, to keep on going, and they experience repercussions from at a later stage in their lives. And some people use their mental power, their mental strength, their optimism, their efficiency, their organisation, their ability to persuade, whatever it may be. Some people use those mental strengths to push on. It works for a while, it works for a while, but it won’t work forever, it’s not designed to work forever. Drawing too hard on one of those areas of your self will cause an imbalance in the system.
But there is a place that you can draw from that taps you in to something bigger than you. It is a collective source of strength and, in fact, gets stronger the more you use it. Therefore it will not cause you to go out of balance, or to get fatigued, whether that is physically or emotionally or mentally. This is what we mean by coming home, by coming into the place inside you where you are beyond your roles, beyond your expectations, beyond your responsibilities, and beyond your circumstances in general.
There’s a great freedom there, and that sense of freedom and being unburdened rejuvenates you. You are literally drawing power off the grid, instead of drawing power from your own limited resources. You perhaps have seen people who do do this, whether they use the church, or whether they use the community, or whether they are deep meditators. You will have seen somewhere people who draw their strength from the grid although it’s not so common in the modern western world.
Paradoxically, as human beings have evolved in medicine, in awareness, in cognitive ability, in other words, as you’ve all got individually stronger, you have become in some ways weaker, because you can get by for a while without drawing power from the grid. It’s only for a while, it never works indefinitely, but because you can get away with it for a while so many of you do it. And, what’s more you, you think it’s laudable to do it on your own, to push ahead, to draw on all your resources, carry as much as you can carry, and so on.
We are not at all suggesting you shouldn’t take a lot of responsibility in the world, aim high, and create to your heart’s content here. But we are suggesting to you that if you wish to carry a lot, you need to remember to draw your power, your strength, from a source that is beyond just your physical, emotional, and mental competencies.
How to draw your strength from the grid
If you wish to do this – and that is always step one, your willingness – it will take investment, it will take time and energy to remind yourself how to draw power from home, from the grid as we have called it, instead of just from you. If you are willing to invest in that, and only if you are, because there is no obligation here, then step two is to enquire into the kind of practice that will suit you best.
There is no such thing as universally the best way home. There are people who have used this path and that, this technique and that, who swear that the only way to be in touch is to have this lifestyle, or that tool, or that teacher. But we are telling you clearly today, clearly, you don’t need to follow. You don’t need to follow anybody else’s way home. There is great liberation in that, great freedom.
In other words, you can if you wish, you can use writing to come home, you can use certain kinds of reading, you can use walking, you can use nature, you can use candlelight, you can use baking for that matter, as long as the following conditions are there. It’s not about the content of the practice you choose to go home, it’s about it becoming a practice.
What is a practice? A practice is something to which you commit, firstly. That’s the first condition. Even the times you don’t feel like it a lot, even the times your practice isn’t going well. That’s the first condition, and strangely enough you have to commit before you start. You can’t see how it goes first, because the quality of commitment changes how it will go.
Part of commitment is regularity, that’s the second condition. A practice is not something you have to do as your job. It’s not something you have to drop your other responsibilities for, but it must be done regularly, even if only for a few moments a day, or a few moments every second day. It’s not about whether you are good at this thing, and it’s not even about what happens during this time, it’s about the permission you are demonstrating on a regular basis for coming home, for tapping into an on-going source of strength, inspiration, also comfort, love, perspective, and so on. To try and just generate these things on your own is exhausting. It is exhausting, and it is unnecessary.
The first condition for a practice is commitment, the second condition is regularity. You come to your chosen practice regularly. It becomes like the invisible heartbeat behind your life. That no matter what happens out there, there is something you return to on a regular, regular basis. Whether that is five to ten minutes of writing each day on your own by the light of a specific candle, or whether it is a walk in an area where you can breath and raise your eyes to the sky, or whether you choose to turn a practical hobby into a practice, or whether you choose, in fact more powerful than all, to be still for that time, doesn’t matter.
What matters is that you have made that practice sacred, and every time you let yourself walk away from your life to devote time to your practice, you are giving permission to privilege your deep self, your soul, your connection to the grid. Every time you do it, even if you are tired, even if you show up irritable, it does not matter. It’s not how you show up, it’s that you show up. Remember this is about coming home.
When you go home, in the most beautiful sense of the word, you can dump your things on the floor and flop on the couch. You don’t need to perform well to go home, not in the real meaning of the word. So, if you wish to, find a practice that feels appealing to you, and accessible to you. Choose to regularly engage with that practice. Come back to it, even if you have strayed far away, come back again, come back home. Invest. It doesn’t have to be an hour a day, not at all, even a few moments. But this practice, as mundane as it may seem, if you are regular about it you are giving permission for that practice to bring you home. In its own way it will tap you in to the grid.
On some days what might be delivered from the grid to you is inspiration. On other days it may be a sense of comfort, or playfulness. You may find that suddenly a good idea arrives, not even in that time you are devoting, but outside of it. Or you may just find that you seem to have the strength to face that, and choose that, and say no to that. It’s because you are tapped in to the grid.
The truth is, to be very accurate, you are never not tapped in, to a degree. You can’t be away from Divinity, you can’t be ever be separate from your own soul, not at all, just like you can’t be separate from your breath. However, the more attention you pay to your breathing, the more you can choose to make it deeper and the more oxygen can flood your system. Oxygen is vital, it brings life, it enriches you on all levels, and it is the perfect metaphor for a connection to source.
You don’t have to connect to source in a boring way, you don’t have to connect to source in a sombre way, you don’t have to connect to source in a churchy way, or even a spiritual way. There are those whose job it is to cut trees – a sad job at the best of times – and we have seen some of them give sacred meaning to that. It has become a practice. They are quiet, present, committed when they are there. And everything they need from the grid opens up to them. Cutting down trees is no one’s idea of a spiritual practice. And yet, we have seen some that are magnificently open to source through that.
No one is excluded in this! No one needs to have resources they don’t have, including intelligence, or gurus, or books. It’s your birthright to be able to draw what you need, what will enrich you, from the grid. And so we invite you into this aspect today, so that you need not carry all that you carry, and face all that you face using only your own resources, or even predominantly your own resources, to do so.
So many of you use your mental and emotional strength so much during every day. You never put it down. You never give it a rest. It’s a poor way to live. We mean poor in a sense that your life could be infinitely richer, especially your inner life. But we can’t force ourselves on you, we never do. We require regular permission from you for our participation, communication and presence. We’re always available, but your free will is so respected in this system – much more than you realise – that often our availability doesn’t translate into actual help to you.
And this is why today we are inviting you into a practice of your choice that you give the meaning of tapping back into the grid. There is poetry that can do this. There is music. There is nature. But you could equally as well use embroidery or drawing for that matter. It’s useful to use something you have a natural attraction towards, something that actually you might like spending just ten moments a day engaged in.
Expect Resistance
However what we can promise you from the outset is that you can expect major resistance from within yourself and you will find that mirrored in the world around you too. Why is that? It’s not a sinister reason at all. It’s simply this: whenever the ego senses that its power is becoming diminished relative to a larger power, it fights. This does not mean you aren’t meant to do it. It doesn’t mean that there is a force out there trying to sabotage you. But you will find, you can indeed expect, that whatever you are doing that is tapping you in to the truth, to Source, to your own soul, you can expect the ego to fight hard.
It’s okay. You can even have compassion for that part of you that resists, that forgets or always finds something else more important to do. Have compassion for that part, love it even. Most things don’t fight so hard when they are being loved and understood and given a voice. But don’t let this sabotage the whole movement. There will be a breakthrough point – in fact there will be more than one, there always is in a steady practice of any kind – there will be a breakthrough point where your experience deepens, or literally breaks through the ceiling. You will know it when it happens. And it will feel both frightening and exhilarating. It’s frightening to the ego and it’s exhilarating to your soul, and that’s okay.
But we are so eager, we are so eager to welcome you more often to play with you and feed you and hold you. And there is great strength to be found in regularly connecting with us. You don’t have to do it in any other way other than the one you choose. And this is very much our strongest suggestion to you at this point. Firstly because we see that you draw heavily on your own personal strength, especially emotional and mental. There’s nothing wrong with that, except that you are so used to drawing heavily, you have for nearly all your life, that you don’t realise, most of the time, that you’re doing it alone. You’re used to it in some ways you have forgotten that there even is a grid that you can plug in to and draw from.
Implications of not tapping in to the grid
The implication of this, as we’ve intimated, is imbalance at some point in the system. The other implication of it, naturally, is that on your own you have far less power, perspective, creativity, intuition than access to when you are open and connected to the whole. And the third implication of this, and the reason that we are talking of it today: when you are going at it on your own most of the time, you don’t have very much energy left for the things in life than might in the end be the most important to you, the most joyful.
There’s very little left at the end of the day or week or month or year, very little left to devote to a new idea or a new friendship or a new joy of any kind if you are using so much strength just to manage your responsibilities. When you are giving regular permission to come home, to tap back in to Source, you will find that sometimes you have both the courage and the wisdom not to work too hard on that situation or that thing. Sometimes you will feel like retracting a bit and seeing how it goes before going to make sure everything goes okay. That is not the same as abdicating responsibility, necessarily, and it’s not the same as being unloving, or lazy, or uninvolved.
Trusting yourself
There are times when the better solution can only come when you are not in the way. There are times when that is the case. It’s not possible for us to tell you in such and such a situation you need to back away, and at such and such a time, or if this and this happens. Every time it’s different. But you don’t need to be taught that, you don’t need to rely on your mind so much, when you can trust that you are tapped in to the bigger picture.
It’s very hard to trust your own decisions when they are just your own. You don’t know if you are being loving or unloving doing this certain thing. You don’t know how much you should be involved and not involved. But when you have demonstrated permission over and over again to be tuned in to the bigger picture, the picture that is beyond just this crisis or this month or this issue, then you can trust yourself a lot more to feel when to step in or not. When it’s just you alone using your emotional and mental resources to their last ounce it’s very difficult to trust.
But when you know that you show up regularly in whatever way you like, to demonstrate your commitment to being in touch with a bigger reality, when you know this, you will start to trust your own preferences, your own impulses, your own intuition, a lot more.
And so these are some of the reasons that we raise this today:
- To help you avoid imbalance and fatigue on some levels of self.
- To keep you connected to a far stronger source of strength and ideas, perspectives, comfort, love, even just humour.
- And also so that as a result of that you have more energy to devote to your joy, and not only your existence. Not only your existence, but also your joy.
Don’t worry about needing to know what your joy is necessarily. If you are using a practice to come back home you are clearing space in the business of your own mind for us to speak, and we will. And we have hundreds of ways to do so. We do it indeed all the time, but often you don’t hear us. Why? Because your energy is so focused on your emotional and mental selves that often you can miss what’s going on in the field, in your field, just beyond that.
If you devote yourself to a practice of coming home, every day preferably, every day, you are choosing to make some space between your thinking and the bigger picture. And we can breathe ourselves into that space. Whether we use your dreams to do that, or the suggestion of a friend, or a picture in a book, or a lyric in a song really is immaterial. But none of those things will work if there is just too much being drawn on in the emotional, mental, or even physical self on its own.
You have to work too hard to keep going if you just use your individual strength, you have to work too hard. And in the hard, hard work just to keep existing you have to shut down a little. Your energy field becomes contracted and dense, and even when we are talking, which we are all the time, you can’t receive it. You are tuned into another channel as it where, that’s all. We’re always available, but we’re available at a specific channel. If you’re so tuned in to other channels, it’s not that we’re not there, but you can’t receive us.
You don’t have to change your whole life to be able to receive us, you don’t have become devoted in the ways necessarily you have seen other people be devoted. You don’t have to call yourself spiritual, at all. In fact if you become unreal in this pursuit it won’t work. But what is required is some kind of container. Some kind of space that you call your own, that is your preferred way home, and that you marry really, you devote yourself to it, through good and through bad. You show up regardless of how you feel or what is there on that day you come home, you come home. So that we can feed you better, so that we can love you better, so that we can enrich and strengthen you more than you can ever know.
Coming once or twice, every now and again, taps you in a little, but not enough. But when you do come home, the beauty of it is that not only do you strengthen your connection to the Divine, you strengthen everyone else’s too! You can’t make choices on behalf of other people, sadly, but what you can do, believe it or not, you can change the very nature of the grid into which you tap.
We understand that this, to the human mind, seems extremely bizarre, but when you tap into the grid you don’t weaken it by what you draw off it, you strengthen it. Every time you come home you strengthen the connection between all of humanity and its own Divinity. The more you tap in, the stronger, the stronger the Source gets.
We are so delighted to offer that here. Thank you.
©Angela Deutschmann 2012